On January 22, I left my office for the day. I was half way home when we
were (simulated) attacked again! That was the third time in two days for me. I ran for a day care
center entrance, donned my ugly mask again, and sat there behind a concrete wall (for protection) with two
strangers. I was able to see though. Then an exercise
evaluator walked up and asked,"Who wants to be a patient?" The other
two pointed at me, and the evaluator took me away.
He tore off a piece of paper and said,"You were riding in the back of
a truck when a cluster bomb went off, throwing you from the truck and
fracturing your femur." I had to lie on the ground and pretend I was badly
injured. Imagine if YOU had to put up with this on the way home from work!
After 15 minutes of yelling for help and talking to the evaluator who
kept saying,"I can't help you, I'm invisible", six people in full chemical protective
gear ran over, picked me up on a stretcher, and dragged me into a
hospital garage while tearing off my chemical gear. Suddenly one guy
ripped open my flak vest and yelled,"CLEAR!" and all these funny looking
people dove behind concrete barriers like frightened little green Ewoks. Then he grabbed me by the vest and
yelled at me,"WHAT IS THIS? WHAT IS THIS?!!!" I couldn't see (gas mask, y'
know?) and I said,"er,uh, flak vest?" Shaking me he yelled again "Is this a bomb?!"
Dazed I thought,"Uh, buddy, if I was hurting as badly
as I'm supposed to be you'd have had a boot to the groin a long time ago".
I said,"Uh, chapstick?"