Ha-ppy Birthday!

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June 8, 1998

After a few more private talks with Brent, Ha said she'd go to Virginia with me. Later, when Brent was in the room, knowing he didn't trust me I asked Ha,"Do I scare you?" She laughed,"No! You're one of the least threatening people I've ever met!"

I phoned Miimii again to ask her to leave for her friend's house. She said she couldn't, and we couldn't stay at the house. I was upset--she was ruining everything. I told Ha we could see the house but we'd have to stay in a motel. The room went silent--she'd think about it. In front of Brent she said,"We'll sleep in your house during the day and go out at night". But she had to get lots of work done before the trip. It never happened, and Brent ended up by himself while Ha and I went to the movies.

On the way to the movies I asked the difficult questions. She said,"Uh, well I guess you could say Brent and I are making the best of a good situation. Yes, we do sleep together, and it's hard for him with you there, but he needs to grow up. I didn't plan on us sleeping together when he moved in". She said he was originally supposed house-sit when she went to Europe (to meet me) but when she found she couldn't go, he still needed a place, so she let him move in anyway. The the relationship was okay with her because he wasn't "the kind of person I want to spend the rest of my life with".

This moment in time captured forever>>>
Ha and I were friends and I'd be the perfect gentleman but, I wanted more. If I betrayed her trust I'd loose her as a friend, and I didn't want that to happen. She agreed--she knew how strongly I felt about her.
After the movie we went driving to Pope Air Force Base and Fort Bragg and parked in a park by a lake to watch the stars. Some cops came by and made us leave. We talked a lot. She kept saying she had trouble with male friends because they were so territorial. She wished she hadn't let Brent stay because it complicated everything. We got back just before midnight and Brent was gone. I took this picture of Ha--it was her 23rd birthday. I told her it was strange being with her because I'm usually restless and want to go somewhere else. My mind usually wanders, but when I was with her I didn't want to be anywhere else. Brent eventually came back and said he'd run out of gas in his car, but Ha didn't seem to care. I asked him what had happened and he told us the whole story. I knew I was not in an ideal place, but I had to let this whole thing play out. I had nothing to lose and everything to gain.