October 14, 1995
The Shackling of Darrel

(Last family picture)
The wedding went okay...no one puked, my dad didn't stand up and scream,"Don't do it DINGBAT!" and at the end we all gave a Nazi salute to Darrel and Wendi (I affectionately call her "Cyclops")....It was quite moving...I cried and cried and cried until I noticed my father was standing on my foot. Then I giggled a little...but I can't say why.

It looks like we're all Nazis now, except Dad...ah yes, Daddy, Filthy Rich...this was the last family picture ever taken. By the look on Darrel's face you'd think my right hand was tickling him. Well, just for the record, it wasn't. I was looking for money...

Mom is leaning dangerously to the right, smiling for no reason, Brenda is happy because her lipstick stayed on this time instead of rolling down her chin and causing people to punch her husband thinking he'd hit her, Darrel is thinking of his wedding night as any Penguin would, I look like I'm trying to do an Ed Sullivan impression, or just trying to sell a snazzy used car, and Daddy, the eternal worrier, is still concerned about JFK who has been dead for nearly 32 years and hoping the six of us don't move back into the house (this almost happened a few months later).

This is my family...we are all part of eachother, however sick that sounds. And Daddy was about to make a grand exit...

A wonderous world is revealed to the five travelers as they venture into the Siamese Zone>>>
<<<previous <<<before the storm
October 14, 1995

Heil Mr. Entertainment!
***Miss Paul has asked that her face not be shown here to protect her identity***
That's not a toupee, it's a skunk!!!>>>
Above is a sh-tty picture of the wedding party...I think someone must have run into the room and yelled,"JFK has been shot!!!" or something like that because none of us look happy (except Darrel, but he's a Nazi anyway). Mom is always happy...no reason. I think it's just because she isn't carrying all three of us in her body anymore, and that's enough to make any woman happy...if we'd never been born she'd weigh at least 605 pounds, and I'm sure she would've fought off Dad on those lonely nights with a little more vigor... So you have to give pie time to sit or you'll burn yourself...I burned myself on my honeymoon and got pregnant with Brenda>>>
I'm sure I'm taller than Mike--Measure us again!>>>
Robert, where is my back?>>>
Okay, this is the LAST wedding photo (applause framed in asteriks litter cyber world). I had to put this in because it's been nine years since you've all seen the coolest guy in the world (I have to say this because he's on my mailing list). That's Robert in the blue dress talking to my mother in the suspenders. I think she is trying to tell him that the official unofficial photographer with the flaming blonde hair (Mr. Horsey-Me) is taking a photo of him, but she's got an apple pie story so interesting he can't be bothered. If everyone had a friend like Robert, then Robert would too. He's great.